I’m typing this out while listening to some R’N’B/Soul. So, I think it’s safe to say that I’m “in my feelings“.
Honestly I’m asking myself this question as much as I am asking you guys. “Why are you afraid to fall in love”
Understandably, looking at how things are and how people behave most of the time. I can relate to why most will not want to fall in love.
No one likes to feel vulnerable or helpless. And I guess love makes you feel EXACTLY like that. You’re figuratively giving your heart to another person, trusting them not to play games and strum the strings like a guitar. Also no one wants to be that person that got “played” by the opposite sex. I understand, 100%. If you deep it, love is not only exciting but it’s daunting too. But all good things are on the other side of fear. Remember that.
Personally, I’ve always had a 90’s R’N’B kind of heart. I put my soul into it, if I fall in love, it’s a both a good & bad thing. But because of this, does it mean I’m afraid to fall in love? It doesn’t feel like fear; it feels more like hesitation, or caution if you will.
Why do YOU think you’re not too keen to fall in love?
A few factors come into play here:
- Past Experiences
- Social Influence
- Unwillingness to “Submit” / Feel Vulnerable
- Not being loved back
Now, if anyone of these factors apply to you then that’s normal. Because more than one applies to me.
I’ve asked myself 3 questions and I think you should also, if you feel like you’re “stuck” concerning this particular subject.
- Envision your life, 5-15 years from now. Would you like to be alone? Or with a companion?
- Do you want kids? Because the last time I checked you need a partner for that.
- Think back to the last time you felt like you were in love. That shit felt good right? So what’s the issue?
Damn. These tunes I’m listening to really have me by the throat lmao…
Anyway, we aren’t getting any younger, better believe that. And contrary to common belief, love isn’t easy to come by, especially one that goes both ways. So if there’s a chance, put the pride aside & go for it. Allow the heart to lead the way.
Furthermore, people that encourage “building a wall” are unhealthy, both physically & emotionally. It has been proven that we need and crave affection, whomsoever we are. YUP, I’m taking about the guys that walk around thinking they are Tony Montana, “hard as nails“.
Listen, Tony had Elvira. And we all know how he ended up once she left his side. You can’t be “hard” all the time. It’s ideal to have someone to go home to and be sarrrftttt with, ya unnastand?
You can’t even mention family in this case, because there are things you can do with a partner that you can’t do with your family… unless you’re a Lannister. But listen, to each their own.
Don’t be silly by blocking your blessings ladies & gentlemen. I know I definitely won’t.
If you’re hell-bent on chasing numerous & eventual dead-end flings at a time. Good luck to you.
If you’re comfortable with forever being alone, that’s cool. You might as well purchase that first cat now.
If you’re adamant that you don’t want to put yourself in a vulnerable position again then you’re a wuss.
I’m hoping this message has triggered something in you. But if it hasn’t, then I apologise for wasting your time. However, it’s changed my perspective on the matter. So I guess some good came out of it regardless.
Before I go, I’ll leave you with some of the songs I had in my ear whilst typing out this piece of work, enjoy.